It’s not every day that the Vice President of the United States stands up and said that he thought about suicide.
That was just last Friday.
As we entered the Memorial Day weekend, Vice President Biden spoke to the TAPS (Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors) National Military Survivor Seminar, a gathering of those who have lost loved ones who were serving in the U.S. military.
With raw emotion, he recalled the day that he found out his first wife and daughter had been killed in a car accident, and the personal turmoil that followed. You can watch Biden’s speech here.
Television host Rachel Maddow introduced Biden’s “off-script moment” on her show by saying “I want this to be on the record as news.” I couldn’t agree with her more. Truly, politics is a messy game, and it’s not always safe to be honest about who you are, where you come from. Biden, no matter what your political stance, took a real risk by sharing his vulnerability. He doesn’t come off looking put together. Instead, he comes off looking quite human.
What did I learn from Biden? Honesty truly is the best policy.
Perhaps I don’t need to say it here, but suicidal thinking is not something to be ashamed of. It can be a response to feeling completely overwhelmed by what life has handed you. For those facing incredible loss, it is a sign that something is wrong - but not that something is wrong with you.
As Biden said, it’s possible for someone to think about suicide “not because they were deranged, not because they were nuts, because they had been to the top of the mountain, and they just knew in their heart they would never get there again."
What would I wish Biden added to his speech? Information for those in the audience who might be thinking about suicide, or who know someone who’s thinking about suicide. A hotline number, a resource center, something to augment his assertion that “you are not alone.”
His message ended on a positive note, a Joe Biden spin on the “it gets better” theme that’s permeated so much of suicide prevention messaging: "Folks, it can and will get better. There will come a day, I promise you... when the thought of your son or daughter, or your husband or wife, brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye. It will happen."
Thanks for being brave, Mr. Biden, for taking a risk and sharing what was real for you.