Shifting Perceptions in New Relationships
For those who are just joining in, this post is the third in a series of blogs analyzing the two levels of close relationships. The level of G represents the global level of perception (whether or not...
View ArticleUnfriendly Skies
Think the most unpleasant part of traveling by air is getting to the airport? Think again. Although getting to the airplane in most cities is no picnic, being airborne is much more stressful. Airplanes...
View ArticleLearning From Fragility
Five years ago, Nassim Nicholas Taleb captured our attention with his account of “black swans,” unpredictable events of extraordinary consequence. Within the year, the financial crisis both illustrated...
View ArticleSpeaking a Truth that Hurts
Whether you are typically cautious or assertive when it comes to stating your opinions without being asked, it is likely you shy away from telling a friend, colleague or family member something that...
View ArticleHomework: An Unnecessary Evil?
A brand-new study on the academic effects of homework offers not only some intriguing results but also a lesson on how to read a study -- and a reminder of the importance of doing just that: reading...
View ArticleThe Science of Magical Thinking
By magical thinking I mean the kind of thinking that uses both empirical and non-empirical sources to achieve extraordinary results. I admit that “magical thinking” is not a great term for what I was...
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Connecting a Trio of Emotional States
A couple of months ago, following a breast cancer scare which turned out to be nothing, I was sitting in my boss’s office and she offhandedly remarked that I tended to be somatic. The remark stung...
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Oxytocin, Fidelity and Sex
"A study published Tuesday in the Journal of Neuroscience has uncovered a surprising new property of oxytocin, finding that when men in monogamous relationships got a sniff of the stuff, they...
View ArticleFrom Tragedy to Art Part II
In 2010, I posted a blog on Psychology Today titled “From Tragedy to Art.” I am excited that a reader found this post over two years later and wanted to know more about how personal narrative and...
View ArticleCouples in Control Struggles
What do most couples complain about? To quote a famous line from the movie Cool Hand Luke: “What we’ve got here is, failure to communicate.” That’s right, many couples I treat report a problem with...
View ArticleThe Making of A Memorable Sexual Experience
Many sexually inexperienced people imagined that their most memorable sexual experience would happen as the culmination of a lifetime of longing, on the traditional wedding night for example. That, of...
View ArticleShellshocked: Beliefs Crash into Reality
Shellshocked, that they lost the election. Dumbfounded, that their polls were wrong. Meltdowns, on national TV and in tweets. Why were these smart people so completely surprised?On election night, Mitt...
View ArticleCan You Really "Do What You Love" These Days?
I have always loved music. I received a music theory honors award in high school. So it’s not a surprise that I started college as a music major. It was a mercifully short experiment. As I like to say,...
View ArticleIs it Rude, Is it Mean, or is it Bullying?
A few weeks ago, I had the terrific fortune of getting to present some of the bullying prevention work that I do to a group of children at a local bookstore. As if interacting with smiling, exuberant...
View ArticleFood Fights and Sibling Rivalry
As an eating disorders therapist specializing in FBT, I read a recent New York Times essay with great interest (Sibling Rivalry: One Long Food Fight)http://nyti.ms/QCW9aK. In the essay, the author...
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Damage Control for the Spoiled Child—Part I
According to a poll commissioned by Time and CNN, two-thirds of American parents believe their children are spoiled. As this holiday season arrives on the tails of Hurricane Sandy’s devastation,...
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Loving Deeper through Fights
Couples argue over many issues: money, sex, child rearing, time, etc. The problem for so many marriages is not that they argue, but instead that they fight without resolving anything. These...
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Healing Trauma through Art
November 27, 2012I finished reading Nayomi Munaweera’s outstanding debut novel, Island of a Thousand Mirrors, somewhere over the Pacific Ocean, on my way to a Buddhist pilgrimage (details to follow)....
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A Very Big Question. What’s Your Answer?
Here’s a question for you.2013 is almost here (how did that happen, by the way?). If, by the end of 2013, you could magically change one aspect of your life, what would you change? What single thing...
View ArticleLearning Resilience During Trauma
Serenity isn’t about freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm.RESILIENCEMost of us do not spend time thinking about how we are going to cope UNTIL stress has arrived. This often leaves us...
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