Welcome back to The Attraction Doctor
In previous articles, I have explored the science behind "the game" and pick-up (here), discussed who might find pick-up techniques appealing or off-putting (here), and even spoke with a pick-up artist (PUA) about his views (here). More generally, I have also shared how to attract women by displaying unique features (here) and how to impress a girl with personality (here). I have even explained how to flirt with a girl (here) and how to ask a girl out (here and here).
Now, I would like to put all of those concepts together and share the science behind pick-up lines themselves. As it turns out, the funny, dirty, corny, and even cheesy pick-up lines might sometimes be quite effective too. Not every pick-up line is appealing though. Furthermore, different lines may impress or attract different types of women. Therefore, the type of pick-up line a man chooses may tell a woman a lot about him—and it may influence his success with her as well.
Researching the Worst and Best Pick-Up Lines
Pick-up lines (also known as chat-up lines) were first scientifically evaluated by Bale, Morrison, and Caryl (2006). The researchers collected 40 pick-up lines from various movie, TV, book, and Internet sources. They then asked male and female participants to rate the effectiveness of each pick-up line for beginning a conversation with a woman. The participants responses indicated that pick-up lines highlighting a man's athleticism, culture, wealth, and generosity would most likely lead to further conversation. In contrast, lines that were simply empty complements or overtly sexual were judged to be least effective by participants.
This line of research was further explored by Cooper and associates (Cooper, O'Donnell, Caryl, Morrison, & Bale, 2007). These researchers used the same pick-up lines and again had male and female participants rate them. This time, however, they gave personality tests to the participants too.
The initial results supported those found by Bale (2006) above. Generally, pick-up lines that showed off some aspect of a man's positive attributes and value as a mate were seen as most effective. These types of pick-up lines were especially appealing to women who were self-conscious, shy, or anxious, and looking for a friendly and considerate man. In contrast, women who were more outgoing and energetic preferred humorous and direct lines from men, as they desired leadership characteristics in their mate. Finally, women who were aggressive, impulsive, and risk-takers tended to especially like the bad boy type—and preferred generic compliments and overtly sexual lines.
Therefore, the authors concluded that pick-up lines serve as a sort of advertisement, filter, and screening device. The type of line a man chooses says something about his personality and attributes. Whether a woman finds a particular type of line appealing says something about her personality and attributes as well.
How to Use Pick-Up Lines
Given the research, when in doubt, it will usually benefit a man to use a pick-up line that highlights something about his value as a mate—usually his athleticism, culture, wealth, and generosity. This will immediately allow him to highlight his uniquely attractive features (here) and his personality (here). It will also allow the woman to see why he is appealing, especially if she is shy or nervous herself. This approach will also let a man to follow-up with conversation to build more of a connection (here), and even ask the woman out in a comfortable, indirect manner (here).
Guys who like to take the lead and enjoy more outgoing women, however, may benefit from adding a bit of humor and being more direct with their pick-up lines. The type of women they desire will appreciate a man who breaks the ice more overtly (here) and asks for what he wants directly (here and here). Such boldness will signal his confidence and leadership. Although it may turn some shy women off, it will be more likely to excite extroverted women and pique their interest—especially when the man is persuasive too (here).
Finally, for men looking for short-term flings with aggressive and adventurous women, an overtly sexual pick-up line might be the preferred approach. This tactic seems to turn on sexual and risk-taking women, while turning off everyone else. Other research on pick-up techniques shows similar results, with bold and sexual behaviors looking sexy to these types of women – and appearing insulting to others (here). Thus, a man might just find a passionate match with this approach, especially when he directly asks for what he wants (here and here), is sexual in his communication (here), and appeals to a woman's short-term sexual interest (here).
Conclusion
Given the research, it appears that pick-up lines can work to attract women, impress them, and start a conversation. Different pick-up lines are used by various types of men, however, and are appealing to different kinds of women. Shy and self-conscious women may go for a line about a guy's positive features. More outgoing women prefer some humor from a confident man. A risk-taking and adventurous women might be piqued by the sexual line from a bad boy. Therefore, it pays to know what type of partner you are after when you use a particular type of line...or when you respond to one too.
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Until next time...happy dating and relating!
Dr. Jeremy Nicholson
The Attraction Doctor
Previous Articles from The Attraction Doctor
- How and Where to Meet Women or Men
- Husband Tracks Sex on Spreadsheet: Does Wife Owe Him More?
- Can Your Unique Features Make You More Appealing Over Time?
References
- Bale, C., Morrison, R., & Caryl, P. G. (2006). Chat-up lines as male sexual displays. Personality and Individual Differences, 40, 655-664.
- Cooper, M., O'Donnell, D., Caryl, P. G., Morrison, R., & Bale, C. (2007). Chat-up lines as male displays: Effects of content, sex, and personality. Personality and Individual Differences, 43, 1075-1085.
© 2014 by Jeremy S. Nicholson, M.A., M.S.W., Ph.D. All rights reserved.