Many of us don’t trust economists because their predictions are cold, biased or wrong. Still, the “dismal science” as economics is sometimes called may be the best source of psychological reasoning we’ve got, in part because it allows cold neutrality that therapeutic psychologists can’t afford. Psychologists often sound more like inspirational speakers or priests counseling virtue. Economists talk less about what we should do than what we really do.
Economists talk about money. Behavioral economists apply economic reasoning to all sorts of currencies--money, power, fame, beauty, efficiency and status, all sources of potential advantage.
Economists say “people don’t leave money on the table,” but that applies to all currencies. We rarely leave advantage on the table. If there’s a source of advantage dangling nearby, we tend to go for it, despite moral arguments against it.
Will we succeed in resisting the temptations of plastic surgery because it’s artificial? Will guys stop watching porn or using Viagra because it’s indecent or inauthentic? Will people forego driving their cars hither and yon because it’s bad for the environment? Will a relationship’s more powerful partner abstain from dominating because it’s oppressive? Will leaders exploit their advantage for personal gain even though it’s bad for society? Will the rich, famous and beautiful stay humble because that’s the better way to be? Will we stop eating bacon, that most delicious of foods, because its immoral or causes health problems?
As a general rule, no. A few might but not enough to make a groundswell of moral abstinence. Dangled advantage doesn’t go unexploited. When we see an opening, we go for it.
Compared to the vivid lusty temptation of advantage, moral doctrine is a weakling. Temptation whispers, “do you want me?” over and over, non-stop as long as it dangles. Morality responds “no!” but falters and then falls silent, replaced with rationalization. Temptation makes us pray for one good reason why it’s okay to take the advantage, and our prayers are inevitably answered.
Why do attractive people so often act like they’re entitled to more than everyone else? Don’t they have any moral sensitivity? Chances are, they have as much moral sensitivity as the next person, just more dangled advantage. They might resist a while, but the temptation is always dangling there, and little by little they slip into taking it with no negative consequences, so they slip some more. We all tend to take whatever advantages we can get away with.
Why, in divorce, do partners declare their exes' manipulative, immoral narcissists? More often than not it’s simply because, despite good intentions, the ex had openings, opportunities to take advantage that can’t be resisted for long.
One night years ago the couple was deciding what movie to see and one partner stumbles on a rhetorical move that worked to persuade the other, a stumble no gut can forget since it worked so well, a move that will work in other negotiations of greater significance for years to come.
If you want, you can take advantage of the opportunity to declare yourself high-minded, exceptionally moral in a world of immoral beasts. But you will do so at a cost to your powers of prediction.
If you want better guesses at what people, you included, will do, keep one rule in mind: sooner or later people succumb to available temptations when they can get away with it.
If you want better moral outcomes, don’t employ moral suasion but instead design systems that make it so people don’t get away with it.
And apply the same reasoning to your own morality. I have a rule I work to apply: I can’t change myself but I can usually change my environment so it changes me. In other words, “I’m no better at resisting temptation than the next guy, so if I want to discipline, I have to design my environment so it doesn’t dangle temptation.
I have a porn blocker on my computer. I don’t bring lusty foods into the house. When I use too much social media I make it inaccessible. I don’t have a chair at my desk; I have a treadmill desk. And I make sure I partner with someone who doesn’t let me get away with much.